I haven't written here is a very long time. It's been my recent opinion that writing is far more therapeutic than people give it credit for being, at least for me. Let me back track.

First off I have a hard time writing what I don't feel. Growing up I wrote poetry. I mean I WROTE poetry. I had so much sadness and upset and it was my outlet. It was my way to speak when I wouldn't be spoken to. I focused my energy into words but they were the wrong ones. I couldn't feel happiness, so I didn't write it. I have hundreds of poems that are stained with tears.

It occurred to me that I need to actually be happy so that I can write about it. After years of pain and injury, and all things foul I took sometime recently took time and shut down. I had a lot of things that I had to work through. I did a lot of crying and writing...mostly I thought.

It's now my mission to write happy, to be happy. I don't know how long it will take and I have goals that may seem crazy to some and ideal to others. As long as I can laugh myself to sleep and greet the sun with a smile ...nothing else will matter.

Hopefully some of you will join me on my mission. Maybe it can inspire you and push you towards your own mission to happiness.

Don't worry it won't be drastic...It will be a positive change, a slow one. I will retain my depth, but will seek happiness with the same passion that I used to fuel my sadness.

I'll be real though...it might feel like when Mary J stopped being sad and started writing that happy stuff...I miss sad MJB sometimes but I understand the journey.





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